After a sleepless night thinking, talking and praying we got the call at 8 a.m. that she is keeping the baby:( She called her mom last night and asked if she could come home with the baby and her mom said yes and then she called her dad who didn't know anything about the pregnancy. She asked him if she could come home with the baby and he said yes too. The good part is she hadn't talked to her dad about this and now it is in the open and she isn't keeping a secret from him. I worried that this secret would be hard on their relationship if it didn't come out sometime.
I believe I am in shock right now. I am so tired that I am not having much of a reaction right now. I did have Kevin make most of the phone calls because I didn't think I could handle saying it over and over. The kids and I have had some good talks. Why was a big question of the little ones. I told the 5 year old that she saw that baby and thought he was so cute and couldn't help but love him. He said " You took my idea. I was thinking he was so cute and she couldn't give him up because of that." Then he said we won't give our baby away. Some are mad because they don't get to go to the Benton's to stay overnight. Mostly, we all agree that we want to keep on with the process. We'll give ourselves some time to grieve this baby boy that we had in our hearts already. We'll give ourselves some time to have our baby and then we'll see where God will lead us next. I still desire to have two together.
Pray for God to give us His peace today and rest from the last few days of waiting and wondering and praying and all that goes with the great emotional highs and lows we've had. Thank you for everyone's prayers and thoughts and comments and calls. It was very uplifting to have so many people lifting us up to the Lord. God Bless.
10 comments:
adoption is hard. really. hard. i am so, so very sorry you are walking this road on the adoption journey. we understand the pain, the grieving. we will continue praying for you as you find a place of rest in Sovereignty of God.
my heart aches for our family.
my heart aches for this baby boy that will have to fight the rest of his life.
my heart aches for this young mom that will have to fight for the rest of her life.
my heart aches for her parents, that will hopefully come alongside this young mom.
my heart aches and pleads to our Heavenly Father that someone will come to this family and show them His Love that will be the best coping tool through life.
and my heart aches for your empty arms and hearts. it is NEVER easy to loose a child; even one that you have not held. I pray for peace for your family and comfort for your hearts.
I am so sorry for your loss. I understand how you are feeling. When we lost ours, I made my husband make those calls too. I don't understand why we go through these things, but I know that God sees the big picture and we have to trust him. We're praying for you.
Still praying for you all ... while you would have wanted this to turn out differently ... God has given you a huge & vital role in this birthmom & child's life that can continue as you think of them ... they will continue being blessed by your prayers.
Rejoicing with you guys also as you prepare soon for a very special birth!! Be sure to keep us all posted. How exciting!! Blessings~ Shelly
I'm so sorry that you are going through this. I can't imagine how hard it must be.
Anne
I'm sorry for your news.... :(
Praying that the Lord's arms wrap around you, that His peace floods over you, that His Love covers you and keeps you as your hearts rest in Him.
Always better to love with abandonment, than to hold back waiting to see what will happen. I pray that the Holy Spirit ministers to each of you and speaks clearly to your hearts that He loves you and is working in and through you.
praying for you;
Kimmie
mama to 6
one homemade and 5 adopted
still praying for all.
I am so very sorry. I can't imagine the heart ache you are feeling. I am praying that God will just comfort you all during this time.
Blessings, Jutine
We too have lost children through adoption. It is so painful. I am so sorry you have to go through this. Let yourself grieve. It will come in waves.
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