Mom's Night Out

Last night was actually mom's night out for the homeschool mom's in the Wahpeton area. I wasn't able to make it. Jordan had an orthodondist appt. in Fargo and we did various other things and on the way home it hit me that I needed to leave right then to make it on time. Well, I had 20 minutes more to get home, unload van and kids and get supper started. I just couldn't do it after such a long day. The kids were bummed. I guess they thought I needed the night off or they wanted me gone for awhile so they could manipulate dad into doing whatever they wanted!!!!! Tonight I ended up outside. It was a beautiful day and I was cleaning up the rest of the garden. I come in the house and it hits me that Jordan has drama at 7 p.m. and I am pretty sure that at 20 to 7 we are not going to make it since I think it is an hour away. It was only the first night, let's figure out what we are doing meeting. But Jordan tells me she wants to be there because she said she would be. That's called responsibility:) So we went and after the meeting I stayed for quite awhile visiting with the mom and boy did it turn into some great talking and God used some of the topics to open my eyes to some sin in my life. I am so glad I still got my "mom's night out". It was a blessing and I pray God will keep using what he revealed to me to help me in my daily walk with Him. Praise Him for the hope he gives us and for His continual forgiveness of me a sinner.

Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

What can we do about the big family prejudice?

OK, I realize this adoption process is disappointment after disappointment but this is hard. I read the profile on the three available children and they sounded like a good match for what we are looking for. But, when the social worker in charge of them heard we had seven she said no and that she is looking for a family with two or less children for these kids. Ugggghhhh!!!! I am so frustrated at this family size issue. Now, I'm not saying that having just two children isn't work and busy. I've been there and at the time is was challenging to get it all in but now I've gotten pretty good at handling things (most of the time) and this keeps coming back at me about the family size. Our children have the advantage of growing up in a two parent home and are pretty well adjusted and I know they would be a blessing to these three children. How do we go about changing a whole mindset of the international community and the social service community? How do we stand up to say we can do this and we would be a blessing to these children and that we wouldn't mess them up. Last night I just prayed for the social worker to change her mind about us. I want her to at least talk to me and find out something about me without throwing me out because I have 7 children. I am frustrated at what I believe to be a "worldview" that doesn't see the value of a the big family. Please pray for us as we know this will be a common roadblock.

Prayer request

I haven't asked for a specific request for quite some time and realize the time is now. We ask you to pray for God to show us and bring us to the child or children he would have in mind for us to have in our home. We received an email tonight about three children needing a home and we just prayed about it and for God to lead us to them if this is right. When we read these kind of emails we think "here they are". God you just showed them to us by this email. Then, it was clearly not His plan as it didn't go anywhere. We are working on our home and changing the things that need to be changed. We're "cleaning house" so to speak. It is a long and sometime arduous process but is so very rewarding as we see the children growing in the Lord and ourselves too.

Galations 2:20 I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.

Why are there not (m)any pictures of me?????

OK, all you mom's out there start giving the camera's to the kids and your husbands and make them take a picture of you once in awhile doing something, it could be laundry or dishes or sweeping the floor since that might be all it seems you do. But better yet, a picture of you reading to the little ones, helping with math, or putting a bandaid on someone. The one you really need to try to get is on your birthday. Annnnddddd while you are at it start assigning someone to make you a birthday cake. It could be a home-ec project. I am busy putting together a photo portfolio of our family doing fun things and everyday things and I'm not finding me on there. An example is the birthday pictures I put together which I just tried to download on here and would you believe an hour of work is lost because I didn't save it. It was a great collage. I put together a collage of the only pictures of me that weren't family pictures!! And for some reason my dial up won't let me upload it. So here is a picture of Kevin and me. Hence, a picture with me in it.

I Tag Aimee too.

Laura tagged three people. I didn't know you could do that so I tag Aimee at 6pack too.

Tag, I'm It

Jana the Queen tagged me so I answer these questions about myself:

Jobs I have had in my life:

1. Hoeing weeds in beet fields
2. Secretary for a lawyer
3. Hostess at a resort in the Black Hills
4. Christmas call drive for the Perry Center
5. Substitute teacher for 19 schools in Rapid, City, SD

Places I have lived:

1. Kent, Minnesota
2. Custer, South Dakota
3. Zurich, Switzerland
4. Fargo, North Dakota
5. Moorhead, Minnesota

TV shows I like to watch:

I won't admit to watching it
but, I like dramas without the
junk. Hard to find.

Places I've been to:

1. Florida with my parents
2. Florida for our honeymoon
3. Florida to help a friend move
4. Maine
5. Europe(Switzerland, Italy, Germany and France)

Fave Foods:

1. Chocolate (cookies, on ice cream, cheesecake, mudcake, candy)
2. Pork chops with some kind of potato and home canned green beans
3. Cherry Pepsi (is this a food?)
4. Oyster stew with lots of oyster crackers and butter
5. Grilled cheese and home canned tomato soup

Books I've Especially Appreciated Lately:

1. The Heart of Anger by Lou Priolo
2. Raising Maidens of Virtue by Stacy McDonald
3. Proverbs for Parenting
4. Philippians (we are studying it in school)
5. The last Ted Dekker book I read (Can he tell you
what's what or what?)

Things I Enjoy: (no particular order)

1. Reading Ted Dekker books
2. Reading other books
3. Canning!!!!!!!
4. When the kids are finally in bed and it is
just Kevin and I!!!
5. Being a mother

I tag Laura at Stepping Out of the Boat

What do the kids think of me?

I did the Queen's little test on the kids, asking to describe me in two words (or I asked them to say two things about me). I tried not to give ideas. Son 2 said I was nice after a big hug. He's the one I had a not so great encounter with recently. So I was surprised. Son 1 said I was nice and made good food. Daughter 2 said I was fun and could laugh when someone was doing something they shouldn't be. (Fun???? I would not use that word with me!) Daughter 1 said I picked out her schoolwork. Translated means: I pick just the things she likes and I know her well enough to do that. She decided the word for it was "mom". The little ones weren't around but Moriah told me the other day after I wouldn't let her touch me with pink clothes on (joking around) that I was funny and she "hiked" me. She puts "h"s in front of a lot of words. So the word she used was liked.

Jordan also said it was cool how I knew what color folder they would pick. I bought several three-ring binders and I guessed what color they would each pick. I told Jordan and then called the other's in to pick the color they wanted and I got them 100% correct. I loved it. I love knowing my kids so well and them appreciating I know them so well. Isn't that a little glimpse on how the Lord knows us so well? Isn't it well and good that mother's should embrace this? We should let our husbands be oblivious of the hundred and one details of our day and the children and let him have the role God gave him and we have ours? After all:

He created them male and female, and blessed them. Genesis 5:2

PS. Aimee or Justine, if you are out there, I have tried two days in a row to leave a comment on your blog and it won't let me on it. Maybe it is the time of the day I do it. Anyway, Aimee, I thought it funny your question of the week was What is your favorite season? Saturday as we were cleaning up the yard Kev and I commented on how we love this season. We like Spring and Fall. Kevin said we look forward to a holiday or a vacation but we look forward to Spring and Fall. The whole season is looked upon with favor! Justine I love the figurine of the two girls. Precious. I would look upon them everyday with all the longing in my heart God has given me for adopting children that look just like them. How absolutely precious.

Called the Social Worker today!

Hi, I called our agency doing our home study to let her know to please go ahead and finish our home study. We had put it on hold after the miscarriage. Now we are pursuing an infant adoption from here in the United States. We need to make up a family profile and send off several copies to her and she can begin to look for someone for us. Our profile will be given to several birth mom's and then they choose us. It will be a challenge because birth mom's prefer families with no children or only one or two. The other route is an agency placement in which the birth mom gives her child up and isn't involved in the process. We are praying for God's guidance in this and for this to be His will and not ours. The desire is there and the need for families to adopt is there so I pray we are following His will.

Please pray:
For whoever God may have for our family; good choices for the birth mom during the pregnancy and for the health of the baby.

For the finances we need. This will cost between $10,000 to $17,000 (much less than the $35K we needed for international). We will begin applying for grants when the home study is completed. Please pray for grant money to be available. If we get picked by a mom it may be needed in a hurry.

Proverbs 19:21 There are many plans in a man's heart, nevertheless the Lord's counsel--that will stand.

New Glasses

I had one of those days yesterday. Some of it might relate to the adoption:) We had planned a big day in Fargo but this got borderline crazy!!!!!! First, I didn't get out of bed until 9:17 a.m. I wanted to leave at 9 a.m. Oops, didn't make it. Checked email for any word on what to do next for adoption. Replied to a friend's email, picked up her girls to go skating with us. Chick food at Fleet Farm, McDonald's (the kids were going to eat while Rebekah got a hair cut but the line was soooo long so no haircut), Skateland for an hour and half of skating and visiting, after we were taking two other kids, then not taking them until later, OfficeMax for sticky tack (they have the good stuff), Wal-mart for Jordan's glasses (see picture), Sam's Club for sugar and flour, Menard's for a gallon of paint (hooray the laundry room will get painted after one year), Great Clips for Rebekah and Emily's haircuts (we needed to give our ears a break from hearing one of them SCREAM everytime we brushed her hair), two extra kids went with their mom, two other kids got in with mine, back to Sam's Club to drop Rebekah off with friends, Wal-mart to pick up photo CD I had in one hour plus needed to exchange something I bought Kev for his birthday but it didn't work, Best Buy for printer ink (had a coupon or else would have done it at OfficeMax), Little Caesers's for two hot and ready pizzas, Mrs. Jones to eat the pizza (too bad she wasn't home), ate in the van, dropped two bunnies off outside of Kent, Mn, picked up two girls for AWANA, went to AWANA, went home!!!! I'm alive but did go to the chiropractor today for having a lot of things out of place!:)

Now about the kind of related to the adoption story! I think Rebekah may have gotten her hair trimmed in a salon once but she was three. I've been trimming it. Well, everytime she heard the stylist ask Emily a question she broke into talk with her stylist, even though her stylist didn't ask a single question:) She told her everyone in the family from oldest to youngest, then she says my mom was having a baby but it died and then my mom had another baby die. Rebekah then says, "We are going to adopt a baby boy.......I think. We don't know what it is. We were going to adopt two families from Ethiopia (correctly said). The one family was three girls, one was 5 but I don't know the other's ages, the other family has a 4 year old girl and two boys." Her words. Then she told how Caleb was the middle child and that he thinks he can get away with things because he is. Do I need to keep an eye on her or what. She will just say anything that comes to mind!

Proverbs 10:19 In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is wise.

A wise verse for anyone, mayhap she gets her loose lips from her mother?!?

The Vote Is In

The vote is in from all the family members. Yes, we should adopt a baby from the U.S. The boys said it has to be a boy and the littlest girl wants a girl, the next littlest girl wants a boy and a girl and everyone else just wants a baby, no preference. After discussing the baby probably isn't born yet, the boys accepted it might be a girl. Oh, this will be so wonderful. We are praying God will open the doors if this is where he wants us to go

I went to church yesterday, first time since I discovered at church that I was miscarrying. Not that I associate it with this bad memory but it was still fresh. During the service again the congregation was asked if they had anything good happen they wanted to share. Well, I stood up to tell how last time we thought we were adopting three girls and pregnant and were so happy and now none of that is true and that we are able to still praise God for His awesome care of us. I just wanted to share that I don't just praise Him when I am happy and things are going my way. Well, someone else stood at the same time and she went first, then another person went and then another and I sat there thinking and chickening out. I really got too sad and couldn't talk when my name was called so I just shook my head no. By then I felt awkward because everyone was looking and wondering what was going on. After that I was just too overcome by emotion to talk to anyone at church because I was trying so hard not to cry. I guess I will have days like that. I feel good today and have canned tomato soup and grape jelly and now we are picking leaves to make leaf people with the little ones.

Praise Him in the morning, praise Him in the noon time, praise Him, praise Him, praise Him when the sun goes down. (part of a song I used to sing in Sunday School)

What Next? What do you think?

I've been thinking hard about our options at this point in the adoption process. We could pass immigration services but it might be tight squeeze through. We might get part way through a dossier in a country to find they don't take families as big as ours anymore. I'm not giving up. I know it sounds that way. I am wondering if we should be turning in a different direction, like domestic infant adoption of a bi-racial baby. I didn't think there was much of a need for that and we've had many children of our own so I didn't give it much consideration. I really thought older kids and a sibling group was where we would best serve the Lord and meet the needs of an orphan. Now that we have seen it could be a challenge we are seriously thinking we should look into an infant adoption. (I am up for a challenge, believe me.) I'm trying to sort out the direction God would have us go with this.

This is our other thoughts on this family size thing. What if we adopted an infant now, if possible and when a few kids left the house we would meet the income requirements and the family size for an international adoption. Maybe our children should be older and God is showing us to just wait, not stop. These are just all the things I am thinking about. Please pray for clarity on what we should do? He has given us the desire and it hasn't gone away. We have been so blessed during this process already. God has turned our hearts toward our children here and given us insight and understanding on their needs and given us tools during this process to meet those needs. He has given us such a network of believers who have followed His word to lift up your brother in prayer. God Bless You.

Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.....Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass. Psalm 37:3,5

A little bit of news

First Picture: 50 of the 75 jars of applesauce.

Second Picture: Just the start of everyone in line for supper.
There are about 50 or more people playing
football and milling around at our weekend

at the Cutler's in South Dakota.

I tried to post last week but my computer connection is so slow sometimes!!! I was downloading pictures of our applesauce making day. I'll put them on anyway even though it was a week ago. The girls and I and a couple of the boys made applesauce from 8:30 a.m until 1 a.m. when Kevin and I finished the clean up. I have to say I didn't feel very good afterwards. It was probably too much but I hadn't canned in so long I needed to catch up. We did 75 quarts in one day. I couldn't believe it actually. It was amazing. I am about out of quart jars and need to do a couple hundred more quarts of applesauce, carrots and stewed veggies, so, if you know anyone who has jars to get rid of.......

I am feeling amazingly well, quite like normal. I had a hard time passing everything but once I did I have felt great. I would like a bit more sleep but that is what it is. One night we got five interruptions and then we went camping a couple nights later. Any mom's out there who don't really sleep when they go camping?!? We camped just one night but were there two whole days. Just the place I needed to be. I started thinking I couldn't handle being around people and I should hole up in my house and clean or something but I am so glad I went. It was a huge yearly home school gathering put on by a family in South Dakota. Some there knew of the miscarriage and most found out through conversation. Most of the 2-3 dozen women there have been through it and were so supportive. We also got tons of support to go ahead with the adoption. Many people there are considering it too and one was in the process but Guatemala has closed their doors and this family isn't sure how to proceed. Please pray for the Englehart family as they deal with the heartache of this process. The kids got dirty(boys were sliding down a steep dirt hill), rode horse, played games, ate lots of good food, bobbed for apples, had a pie contest, corn eating contest, Cowboy show with a family from South Dakota who put on shows with roping, whips and music and more, a couple hayrides. The kids were worn out. They slept in yesterday but we did manage to get school in. They are just rousing now at 10 a.m.

OK, on to what this blog is for. I called USCIS, Immigration Services and after many buttons pushed on the phone to find where I needed to be, wow, do they have options. I was even disconnected once after explaining what I wanted to know. I found someone and he said we could count assets in our home or bank accounts toward our income requirements. We should qualify now but I am wondering if I need to have the house appraised to show the actual equity. It has been six years. Six years ago it cost $350 to have done. These surprise costs always get me. I was told we go ahead and fill out the I-600 form, make an appointment with an immigrations services worker and they will go through the qualifications then. I just want to find out before we progress too far. The cost of processing the I-600 is $800, I think.

Thank you again for the prayers. I just know that God has heard and helped me deal with everything and to feel so good.

We must understand that we are stewards (managers) of all that God has put under our care. We are not owners. Our lives, our time, and our assets are gifts from God. We are responsible to God for them, and He will hold us accountable. Found throughout the verses in Matthew 25:14-30 Taken from the Billy Graham Christian Worker's handbook.