courageous
Friday, October 26, 2007
What can we do about the big family prejudice?
OK, I realize this adoption process is disappointment after disappointment but this is hard. I read the profile on the three available children and they sounded like a good match for what we are looking for. But, when the social worker in charge of them heard we had seven she said no and that she is looking for a family with two or less children for these kids. Ugggghhhh!!!! I am so frustrated at this family size issue. Now, I'm not saying that having just two children isn't work and busy. I've been there and at the time is was challenging to get it all in but now I've gotten pretty good at handling things (most of the time) and this keeps coming back at me about the family size. Our children have the advantage of growing up in a two parent home and are pretty well adjusted and I know they would be a blessing to these three children. How do we go about changing a whole mindset of the international community and the social service community? How do we stand up to say we can do this and we would be a blessing to these children and that we wouldn't mess them up. Last night I just prayed for the social worker to change her mind about us. I want her to at least talk to me and find out something about me without throwing me out because I have 7 children. I am frustrated at what I believe to be a "worldview" that doesn't see the value of a the big family. Please pray for us as we know this will be a common roadblock.
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6 comments:
I think here's the thing...people who are around familywith only a couple of naughty kids equate a large family with lots of naughtiness and surely NO ONE could handle more kids. The only way to combat that is BE around them and let them see how well functioning your family is.
In your situation, of course that is hard because you have to get past that initial size shock, whihc on paper looks totally different than in real life. Is this a domestic, out of foster care situation? You can email me ifyou want...
Oops...the above is from the Queen...
You know what our social worker said to our other social worker? "They are amazingly mellow for having eight people in that house! My kids make more noise and I only have three."
See, people DO equate more with more noise and chaos, but usually when you have more it is because you *train* them!!
Hang in there. God knows your children and when the time is right, it doesn't matter what anyone says, they will be yours!
God is in control. No matter what. If it's His choice to send a child or two your way... no social worker or agency will stand in His way.
I understand your frustration, I really do!
We have 7 and we have turned down domestically numerous times. We are now doing Liberia Africa. They have no rules.
Remember before the foundations of the earth were formed, He chose your children for your family...whoever they are, wherever they are.
He WILL bring them into your arms!!!
We all join you in expectantly waiting on the Lord!
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