Disgruntled and ashamed of it!

My husband is home sick. He hasn't been feeling good for awhile and as I go through my day I wonder if our crying, complaining, disgruntled way of life isn't the cause of it. As I listen to the children and their fighting back and forth and talking to me and to Kevin I hear so much of this plus unfortunately, I hear myself. I found myself listening to me today, really listening and I sound like them!!!! (Which I know really means they sound like me.) I am so into getting school done for the year that I have become the greatest picker ever. I pick at how this one sits, how this one answered me, how this one should have done it this way, how this one does this and so on and so on. I don't know how to stop. Once I realized it I tried but it kept coming out! I am not happy with myself for this rut I've created and need to get out of it for all of our sakes. I am ashamed to say but I haven't been turning to the Lord for help because frankly he must be sick of me sounding like a broken record. I know that isn't true but it is probably I just don't want to hear me say the same thing again. Thankfully, God has given me another day to do it differently.