Life of a Middle-aged Drama Queen...

That should be my new title of my blog. I certainly seem to have my fair share of drama. I was really looking forward to 2010 being less event filled. Yesterday seemed to be trying to top last year's top 10. I ended up in the emergency room yesterday after the bleeding from a miscarriage wouldn't stop. When I started bleeding I thought, "Oh, good, because now it will progress since I had been miscarrying since Monday." Then, it kept on coming. Kevin was home yet cleaning out the driveway because about 6 a.m. he was going to go to work and said I probably wouldn't be able to get out the driveway today. He didn't have time and had an important job to get to. I said, "but how will I get to the doctor today (I was going to say hospital but changed it to doctor)?" I knew something wasn't right this time and kept imagining bleeding was involved. I've never had a clear thought quite like this before. I didn't tell that to Kevin though. I think he just knew he had to clear the drive.

I continued bleeding so profusely all the way to the hospital that at one point I thought, "I'm not going to make it!" I looked at Kevin but what do you say when you think the words are your last. I just said, "Help me Jesus." We did call an ambulance on the way because I knew I needed my vitals taken soon. We met it a few miles from the hospital and at that point everything was stable. At the hospital they must not have realized how much I was bleeding because they were going so SLOW! I wanted to shout at them to hurry it up because I don't have much time. When the nurses took my pants (soaked to the very bottom) they realized it was a bit more serious than they were treating it and in moments I had a lot of people in the room. I nearly passed out when my blood pressure went to 60 over 30 and my heart rate went sky high. Fluids got me over that and then I got a work over for about an hour. I had a lot of IV's with different things and then within moments I was down to one nurse in the room. I kept hearing we were going to the operating room so I said, "things are stable now and I'm not going?" They got the bleeding to slow considerable so they were going to watch it and see if it continued like that and thankfully it did and I'm here writing at my computer. I stayed the night since we are 40 miles out. The doctor said if we lived in town I could go home. I was glad to stay since I knew it would be hard to rest completely still here. I did lay down a bit today but not nearly as much as I should. Thankfully, again, the children took over everything and everything is quite well here.

I am thankful to the Lord for being with me and for deciding it wasn't my time to go. I am thankful to be home again with the kids and to get back to some kind of "normal" :) If there is such a thing. I do pray that I was some sort of witness for the Lord there although I didn't witness directly to anyone. I hate dead air as you can tell by my writing every detail so I talked the whole time they were working on me because I just don't know what to do with silence. The doctor holding my uterus to stop the bleeding said it's because of all the pregnancies that your uterus isn't contracting. I laughed and said, "Oh, that's what they all say, you've had too many children and your uterus isn't working properly." He just said it's true. Well, I don't question that it isn't true to some extent but tell me why the first nurse of the night only has two children and had a miscarriage like this one if it's all about how many children you have? I believe it just happened this way and it was for some purpose I may not know until I reach heaven.