I can't remember this happening before...

I missed a doctor appointment today. I wrote down Wednesday 2 p.m. and it was really on Tuesday!!! I just can't believe that happened. It was a treatment for Isaac and I was having a computer test again. I'm excited to see what progress I've made this time. I have eaten a lot of chocolate lately so I'm real curious how that may play into it. I have been able to keep anxiety at a dull roar but emotionally I craved chocolate so just ate an obscene amount last week. It made me feel so good! :) It was hard to delineate if I was tired from chocolate overload or from getting up with various kids 3-5 times a night so I might as well be on a high if I'm going to be low! (If you get my meaning :) )

We are almost done with swim lessons. We carpooled with a friend which is great as I get to talk to a real person every single day! (My kids are real people but again most of you Know what I mean.) Em is on level 6, her final year! The weather is better this week. 15 people in my van! Fun to actually fill it to capacity!

Life continues to be a roller coaster. I'm not trying to jump off anymore. I'm more just closing my eyes waiting for it to come to the end of the challenging turns and twists and topsy-turvy loops. I know I'm dreaming if I think it will ever end but I guess I'm looking for certain things to level off and I'm just walking around again on level ground with minor bumps in the road. :) Isn't God good?!

Still praying for Isaac's hemoglobin to go up, up, up!

Special Request...

We have seen incredible progress in Isaac's recovery these last few months, weeks, days. His hemoglobin still remains low and we are asking that you would pray for it to increase. We are working on increasing his iron intake through juicing and iron-rich foods. We appreciate you praying for this specifically in the next few weeks. His energy level continues to increase and the other day at swim lessons he hung upside down on the monkey bars, pushed his siblings on the merry-go-round and went on the swings and went real high. He is liking feeling so good. Praising God for all we see and all we are learning through this journey.

Yahoo!

No, not a new email address at yahoo.com but Yahoo!!! Isaac gained 5 pounds in about a week. We can tell he's really changing again and it's happening. He is getting well!! He had gotten down to no muscle mass left on his body and now he is nearly what he was last summer. His legs are back to normal and now just in the last two weeks he is getting muscle on his arms. What a complete relief! He continues to feel good and started cooking again this week. He has always liked to cook and bake for the family. He made muffins yesterday for us for breakfast. So nice! Praise the Lord with us and rejoice! Pray for continued healing in all areas of his body. Thanks so much.

A couple weeks ago I was dealing with some extreme anxiety. It really had a grip on me and would hit at any time. I felt so helpless to control it. Keeping busy didn't even really get it under control. I did start a Bible Study two weeks ago called "Me, Myself, and Lies" by Jennifer Rothschild. I may have mentioned it but it has been a gift. She likes to refer to the thoughts we say to ourselves each day as our thought closet. What we are thinking and saying over and over are what we clothe ourselves in each day. Whether it is negative, positive, defeating or not our thoughts control a lot of who we are. It has given me some good scripture to ponder and whenever I feel my anxious thoughts taking over I quickly try to focus on something good or just change the channel so to speak.

Psalm 94:19 In the multitude of my anxieties your comforts delight my soul. (Thanks to Sharon for that one.)

Matthew 6:27 Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature.

Philippians 4:4 Rejoice in the Lord always, Again I say rejoice!

2 Timothy 1:7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of sound mind.

James 4:8 Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.

Romans 15:13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Today, I felt a great peace wash over me as I was pondering our new challenges and God gave me a sense of "I will never leave you nor forsake you." and that he is in charge. I need not worry anymore because he will take care of it all. I pray each day I can keep this faith that he really will be there and is really in charge. Plus who could really be down when Little Lena is in your life. Isn't she adorable. She has four teeth and is scooting not crawling and gives kisses :)

Big...fat...

Yesterday, we went out to a man-made lake nearby and spent the day boating and swimming with my brother and his family and my parents. The kids had a great time. My 5 year old though decided again to test the "Who's the boss?" idea. She was "screaming" because someone wouldn't give her something she wanted right now. I could not get her to stop so I had to take her up the "mile long" hill. It's not that tall but boy is it a long way to the top. Of course, she dropped to her knees so I drug her a very little bit and her swimsuit got dirty so she picked up several handfuls of sand and threw them at me. Once we got to the wood she had second thoughts on dragging her body. The closer to the top we got she told me that once we got to grass she was dropping to the ground again. Then, the big one hit! She yelled at me, "You're a big...............fat...............................................................mom." She had a time figuring which word would come next. Surprisingly, I stayed incredibly calm and continued the fight up the hill. She did drop when we got to the grass. I then walked to the van and did something I hate to do. Two things actually, I counted to ten and made a threat. I decided I meant the threat so told her, "I'll count to ten and you need to be in the van or I will go down and get all the kids and we will go home." She must have believed me because she was there by the count 6." She did continue screaming at me from the back seat. I just sat with the door open leaning on a cooler praying for God to give me wisdom, for God to release her from whatever was causing this temper tantrum and for God to just help me with my life. I did ask her if she needed a hug or something because sometimes that brings her out of it. She didn't want it right away but eventually I got an apology (I didn't ask for it) and she came quietly out of the van. I took her swimsuit hostage and said we'll see how she behaves on the walk down and for the 10 minutes she had to sit next to me. She was perfect the rest of the day. She's been doing this lately. What to do? Continue showing her "I'm the boss" and continue staying calm. If only I wrote this all down in a journal. I could have some great reading material on each of the kids' wedding day!

You know you're a redneck...

when a chicken gets a box on it's neck, you don't want to waste it so you butcher it right then and there and put it in a pot for supper. (Without calling your husband to ask what do I do now?)

Much improved...

Isaac is doing so well, I cannot even tell he had gotten hurt just one week ago. It is a far cry from the cries he had when he couldn't even walk on it 6 days ago. When he woke his foot was not swollen and he had no pain. Tonight, it was a bit swollen but still no pain, just some itching from the swelling. I think Isaac will be able to write a book someday on his journey. I should be taking more notes for him. Sometimes I think I could write a book but it seems to me there is a story out there somewhere like mine. Today, my anxious thoughts were able to be kept at bay. I worked at it plus just stayed busy plus Isaac is doing very well so I had no major reason to be too worried. Thanks for praying!

We enjoyed our 4th by staying home. A couple from church had a shindig yesterday but Kevin is gone so much that he just wanted to be at home. We did a few chores :) in the first part of the day. It was great to have Kev around. He got my tiller running again and other little things that I needed him for. It's usually dark or too buggy by the time he gets home. I am spending my time weeding. I got the one garden weed-free and boasted with a picture. Well, I just can't get the back garden to even resemble weed-free. My carrots are being strangled and these giant weeds are about to seed out! I did get the lettuce and cabbage done. Next, onions, peas and tomatoes and the viney stuff. Oh, and the strawberries. Did you know that a fresh strawberry ripened on the vine is the most delicious strawberry? What a taste sensation!

Have a great week! God Bless!